Summary:
Gabby Bernstein reveals the multi-faceted blueprint that will release you from the shackles of the past and carve the path to a liberated YOU.
Listen To The Full Episode Here:
Who Is Gabby Bernstein?
There is a burning desire in everyone to be happy, but somewhere in our collective pursuit, we’ve lost our way – whether that’s feeling trapped by trauma, overwhelmed with shame, or caught on a rinse and repeat spin of numbing vices.
Gabby Bernstein, New York Times bestselling author, motivational speaker, manifestation coach, and podcaster, has been exactly where you are, and she’s come out the other side. Fresh from penning her 11th book, Happy Days, Gabby joins Almost 30 to share how her past traumas have shaped her to become the embodied, liberated being she is today.
In this post you’ll learn:
- Gabby Bernstein on freedom
- The nuances of trauma
- How to regulate the feeling of anxiety in the body
- The way to restore safety in your body
- How to empower “the leader” over “the protector”
Gabby Bernstein on the Pursuit of Freedom
Gabby Bernstein considers herself a doer and an action-taker in the pursuit of freedom. Her new book, Happy Days, is meant to help people recover from their trauma (whether it’s little t trauma or big T Trauma) because no matter what your life circumstances have been, Gabby knows that everyone has experienced anguish.
The intention of her latest book is for the reader to witness someone else’s miraculous recovery and all the steps that it took for them to get there. Gabby hopes that by witnessing others’ success, the reader will feel less alone.
Gabby Bernstein on Trauma
Gabby explains to us, and in Happy Days, that whether our trauma is big or “small,” we tend to minimize it because we have a lot of shame. There’s shame in the idea that we could have been abused, neglected, bullied, or that we lost something.
We use shame to play our trauma down, and then, in other cases, we use it to play our trauma up, like when adopting a victim mentality and wearing trauma as a badge of honor. There are different ways we approach our perception of our traumatic experiences.
Trauma is an energetic disturbance that when we are seeking healing, we actively want to recover and reprocess (even if we haven’t even named the “thing” as trauma).
For so many years, the word “trauma” has been shunned and silenced. Gabby believes that the more we normalize it and accept the reality that we’re all traumatized, the more likely we are able to return to safety within.
How To Restore Safety in the Body
Gabby dedicates an entire chapter in her book to the body and the somatic experience, which is a body-based therapy that is about restoring inner safety while helping the body to self-regulate.
Gabby met her anxiety later in life and felt very dissociated and physically disconnected. So, in her journey to recover, she reclaimed her connection to her body.
Many traumatized souls are disembodied. It’s like our soul separates from our physical presence and checks out until we feel safe enough to reclaim and retrieve it.
We all have protector parts of ourselves that work very hard to protect us from experiencing, remembering, or feeling those exiled child parts, the abused child, the bullied child, the neglected child.
Gabby’s protector parts were the controller — anytime the little child in her felt out of control, the controller would come in and say, “No, I protect her” (even if these were the parts of her that looked like yelling at somebody).
Gabby explains how although she didn’t like that side of her, it had a valuable role in keeping her safe.
How To Know Our Different “Parts”
Therapy allowed Gabby to put down her shields. It created a safer environment for her to get to know her child parts. It’s important to awaken and witness without judgment the parts of us that are in fierce, extreme protection.
When you begin the process of befriending your protective pasts of you, you can rewire your whole system.
All of the parts have a very important role in the system.
They have helped to manage the fear of ever going “there” again, as well as all of the details so that we don’t feel what we felt during our traumatic experiences.
Because Gabby released extreme patterns, the controller side of her is more relaxed and fun!
The biggest goal is to connect to your own self-energy, so you can start to realize that there’s a totally different way of living. It’s liberating to know and feel that you can live without being reactive and in an extreme state.
The goal is not to abolish any parts of us, but rather to regulate them and lessen their extremity.
Any negative pattern is merely protectors in extreme roles. Patterns like alcoholism or defensiveness are just the protector in their extreme role.
The more aware we become, the more we let the protector parts know our higher self.
The higher self lives to be compassionate, curious, and caring. When we are attuned with our higher self, we become less extreme.
You can trust that you will find joy along the way. The more you add up those moments of relief, the freer you become. And that’s what her book, Happy Days, is all about.
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